The Problem with the #Women Against Feminism Movement

I took the time to read a few pages of this blog/tumblr/FB page today. I feel fairly comfortable in saying that the problem with this blog is not what these women are saying, but with the basis for which their opinions are formed upon. This blog demonstrates so clearly the failure of education, in that outside of a pitiful few comments, the majority of the views expressed seem to be based on social media reporting and a few extremist arguments. The key points that popped up over and over center around the following statements-

" I don't hate men/my spouse,brother,father,friend respects me"

Being feminist doesn't mean hating men. By the same token, it doesn't mean all men hate women. It does mean recognizing that there is a societal differing in how the genders are raised, presented, and culturally groomed, and that there is a problem with that grooming. More on that later. But, to this statement, it's no different that the racial argument that states "Racism doesn't exist because there are anti-discrimination laws. I know XXX African American/Hispanic/Non white people who are successful"

The fact that there remains a cultural bias that operates under the protection of those laws is undeniable. That it effects children from the very beginning of their lives has been studied, reported on, and spans everything from their public school education opportunities to the broader aspects of life such as medical care and even customer service received in business is also undeniable. The fact that you may know a person who doesn't fit the mold is anecdotal evidence. It doesn't negate the fact that it exists.

"There is no rape culture"

This one burns. If there is no rape culture, then tell me, when the last time you saw a boy who looks twelve posing suggestively in underwear for a major retailer ad campaign? When is the last time you saw a man get cat called, ass slapped, or ostracized for not fitting a societal ideal image? Yes there were a few commercials of women ooggling construction workers or the Fed Ex man, but the gimmick in those commercials was that it was unexpected.

The problem with this statement is a misunderstanding on what 'rape culture' means. Rape culture is not the idea that every man is out to rape, and views every woman walking by a prey. It is not that every woman is a victim waiting to happen. It is not as base as that.

The idea of rape culture is that women are highly pressured to fit an image, and that image is whatever is deemed appealing to men. If a woman doesn't fit that image, she is ridiculed and taken as less than. It is the idea that regardless of a woman's accomplishments, she must do them WHILE maintaining a socially acceptable image, and that image is to be confined to something men want to see, that women are conditioned to expect from other women.  It is the base stamp of ownership over a woman's very existence, and the idea that at the core, the woman is there to please.

Again, if you take offense to this, reflect for a moment on when the last time you were subjected to headlines regarding a man's hairstyle choice, clothing choice, or even, in the case of several successful lawyers, doctors, political activists, authors and educators in the last few years- blogs and social media dedicated to outright lamblasting and insults over their unattractive appearance?

" I already have equal rights. Women make less money  because of their own choices"

If this isn't a perfect illustration of the chicken or the egg argument I can't think of a better example. Women don't already  have equal rights. Period. As for the pay gap debate, yes, women make less perhaps because of the fields we are in, and the fact that we are the sex to take maternity leave and stay home more often. Now, imagine if we taught the sexes the same, and didn't encourage girls to pursue certain fields, instead encouraging them to pursue higher paying fields. Imagine if corporations supplied men with the same amount of paternity leave as they do women maternity leave. Wouldn't it be reasonable to expect a shift in the social paradigm of which sex stays with the children in the tender years? Yet, girls are steered to 'acceptable' fields, and man are not given the same leave as women, so the status quo remains.

" I am not a rabid, hysterical, man hating, extremist woman out to destroy society and family."

This is the very core of the feminist movement. The hysterical label has been used since the dawn of time to suppress and discredit feminist arguments, and I think the history of that deserves it's own post. To this, I'd like to quote Hillary Clinton, in her interview with Glamour editor in Chief Cindi Leive, reported on 8/7/2014:

"I have generally not responded if it's about me. And I have responded if it's about somebody else, because if women in general are being degraded, are being dismissed, then I can respond in a way that demonstrates I'm not taking it personally but I'm really serious about rejecting that kind of behavior. Now, sometimes, when it's about me...you have to not just remain silent but try to figure out a proper response. Again, though, not going to the place of anger and feeling sorry for yourself, because that kind of plays into the hands of the sexists."

I can't express how much I love this quote and the full thought behind it. Recognizing that the hysterical label has been used to debase real arguments, and the aversion to the potential of being labeled as such as a control method, is priceless. By adopting it's usage and labeling eachother as hysterical, women are aiding the anti-feminist movement and becoming key players in the suppression of women.